Learning to Walk

studying

I think that sometimes there can be a danger that within charismatic Christian circles the spiritual benefits of academic study are not fully appreciated.  What do I mean by this?  Well, simply that we can sometimes fail to recognise that for some it is through intense study - both of the bible but also, for example, of church history - that they gain greater insights into the Christian life and the greatness of God.

This has certainly been the case for me this week as I have studied in a little more depth the sections of John's gospel that we are looking at in the new 'Together' series.  I have really been enjoying reading the Bible Speaks Today commentary on John and in a few areas have gained new insight into the text as a result of this study.  On a couple of occasions I have literally felt my love for God growing as I've gained these insights - it's been pretty special!

I've also found that the message from Sunday morning, when we looked at Jesus being the bread of life and the only one who can truly sustain us, has come back to me in at least two different situations during the week and has helped to keep me going when I was feeling a little frustrated!

It really has been a great week for remembering and appreciating the different ways that God speaks to me and helps me to grow as I seek to walk with Jesus.

injured

We are playing Selkirk away today and I've had to make a call I prayed I wouldn't have to make this year; the call saying that an injury wasn't sufficiently recovered to play.  Earlier in the week I thought that if anything stopped me it would be my ankle, but it seems fine (ish).  Unfortunately, however, my hamstring isn't.  I've been trying to stretch it out and I could quite possibly jog around on it without too much discomfort.  But as soon as I begin to pick up the pace it becomes really uncomfortable to the extent that I'm concerned I'll make it worse.

Calling off is always a difficult thing for me, primarily because I find it difficult to decide if it's really as bad as I'm making out.  A common question for me is as to whether or not other players would make the same decision or am I just being 'soft'.  I think there have been times in the past when I've been over cautious - perhaps as a result of the fact that I wasn't particularly enjoying playing at the time - but this year I've got a real hunger back for playing and so I don't think that's the case now.

As I said I'd been praying that I wouldn't have to miss any games this season due to injury.  I'd also been praying for a miracle in healing for my ankle and hamstring because of the message it would send out to my team mates.  This raises interesting questions about prayer, like; "Did God hear the prayers I, and others, asked?  If He did why didn't he heal?" etc.  I believe that He did hear and I think it was fine to pray these prayers (as it was fine to pray for Scotland to win on Wednesday night!).  So why didn't I recover in time? I have two thoughts: First, I imagined that a miracle heal would have been the best witness to my team mates - but perhaps God has other plans for me with them (or others) today through being injured.  Second, the tension of the 'now and not yet'.  Does God want me to be injured?  I don't think so - I don't think He wants any of us to be ill or injured.  But we still live in that time when there will be outbreakings of the kingdom, seen in many ways - including healing - yet, until Christ's return, we'll need to live with the fact that that isn't always the case.

What will always be the case is that the Holy Spirit can speak to us - regardless of our situation.  I wonder what He has to say to me through mine today...